The Past

This is one of my more vulnerable videos. I am being open and honest about my past and the difficult things I endured throughout the course of that time. Things have changed since I made this video, which I will briefly mention here:

I currently am back on medication for things that I deal with. There’s nothing wrong with being on them if you need to be. At that time I wasn’t in need of that sort of intervention but, with time, things always have the possibility of changing.
I no longer work where I work where I said I did in the video. I work in a laboratory now, which leads me to my next bullet point.
I didn’t get my bachelor’s in nursing, but in Clinical Lab Science instead.
My relationship with my mother isn’t in the same state as it was in the video. I didn’t truly have her back, and I don’t have her now. Yes, she is living, but the relationship between us is severed due to choices that she has made. Yes, I do carry some bitterness about it now.

This is a very condensed version of the things of my past but I wanted to be open and share my story so that maybe someone out there will find the courage to share theirs as well. We currently live in a society that wants to hush these sorts of outcries but do not be hushed, do not have fear. Your story is worthy of being heard and you are worthy of healing.

I really hope that you took the time to watch the entire video, and if you did, thank you. It took a lot of guts for me to make and share that video when I did. It might even answer some questions for some of you that know me as to why I acted the way I did in the past…especially in school. I was enduring a lot. It was hard for people to understand because it hadn’t happened to them. HOWEVER, I am so glad that these people had not experienced this and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Just having a friend during that time meant the world to me.

I hope that you can take away something positive from my vulnerability in this video and it can even possibly help reduce the stigma surrounding mental health and specifically abuse. I want all of you reading this and watching my video to know this: there is help, there is hope, and there is healing available to those who seek it. Don’t be afraid to do so. Your life is worth it.

xo, Alyson

3 thoughts on “The Past”

Hi Alyson , Yes I watched it last night , right before I found that you are a very good guitarist and singer and that we are both a fan of Gabriela , many time I have commented she needs to teach , talent like that needs to be passed on so it is not forgotten. We should never be forgotten , no matter what. All of us hold in our hearts a piece of magic , hers is clearly being one of the greatest female guitarist of our years.
What will I leave behind , that had been an on going question. I hope my words will serve purpose and help , that is why they are intended to do , but we shall never know.

That is why I hold my trust to your generation Alyson to keep me alive many years after I pass , don`t worry , I am not planning on an early departure. But it would give my joy to know and understand that I have made a difference.
That is something we all must do , it is our responsibility to make each generation smarter and kinder than the last .
Gone is the racism of the 60`s , the hatred of the past , we need to be able to move through all of this junk no matter who we are.

While / Black / Brown , Jews and Gentiles , Gay or Straight or LGBT , we are all of this Earth and all As One.
No longer can we feed off of hate , we need to learn to accept and respect other for who they are , not what they are.

Gary Stanton Ingerson 10/12/18

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Thanks for sharing Alyson. You are doing much better! I enjoyed reading this.

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Krista says:

October 13, 2018 at 5:29 am

Just watched video & wanted to tell you sorry that things got worse with your mother & hope you continue to grow & do well with. You are an inspiration to us.

LikeLiked by 1 person

Reply

Gary Ingerson says:

October 13, 2018 at 1:41 am

Hi Alyson , Yes I watched it last night , right before I found that you are a very good guitarist and singer and that we are both a fan of Gabriela , many time I have commented she needs to teach , talent like that needs to be passed on so it is not forgotten. We should never be forgotten , no matter what. All of us hold in our hearts a piece of magic , hers is clearly being one of the greatest female guitarist of our years.
What will I leave behind , that had been an on going question. I hope my words will serve purpose and help , that is why they are intended to do , but we shall never know.

That is why I hold my trust to your generation Alyson to keep me alive many years after I pass , don`t worry , I am not planning on an early departure. But it would give my joy to know and understand that I have made a difference.
That is something we all must do , it is our responsibility to make each generation smarter and kinder than the last .
Gone is the racism of the 60`s , the hatred of the past , we need to be able to move through all of this junk no matter who we are.

While / Black / Brown , Jews and Gentiles , Gay or Straight or LGBT , we are all of this Earth and all As One.
No longer can we feed off of hate , we need to learn to accept and respect other for who they are , not what they are.

Gary Stanton Ingerson 10/12/18

LikeLiked by 1 person

Krista says:

October 13, 2018 at 5:10 am

Thanks for sharing Alyson. You are doing much better! I enjoyed reading this.

LikeLiked by 1 person

1. Krista says:
  
  October 13, 2018 at 5:29 am
  
  Just watched video & wanted to tell you sorry that things got worse with your mother & hope you continue to grow & do well with. You are an inspiration to us.
  
  LikeLiked by 1 person